19, skyy, Butler, Pa

how are we suposed to know or find out if we are being cheated on? like my man says if you want to be with me you have to trust me but he always talks to girls and treats me diff around them. My friends already feel some type of way about him so i dont wanna ask them. 

Jessica, 22, Virginia

Me and my boyfriend have been dating a year, or, should I say would have been dating a year on March 24th. I had wrote down the day we started to date, something I never ever do for anyone, but this relationship seemed special. After all, he was a good friend of mine, a secret crush, and many other things before we started to date. But, anyway. I started to fall in love with him..Over time. It was a huge mistake, he fooled me. It turns out when he told me he loved me, hugged me, kissed me..It turned out he never meant any of it. It was all just an act. He had been cheating on me, with more than 1 girl I should just say.. He broke my heart, once again. Before him I had dated a total loser, my ex, who cheated on me to. He played me, etc. And is still a jerk today. I'd told my boyfriend everything about him, he acted as if he understood. That's how I became to trust him more without cheating on me. When I found about the girls, my heart tore. I didn't understand, yet once again. I broke up with him, feeling SO stupid.. He acted like that if I left him, I would be hurt, and stuff. And he wouldn't get hurt at all. he acted like it was all my fault, etc. My friends weren't much of a help, they'd all just tell me to forget him, move on. To just try harder. But they obviously don't understand..Losing someone you thought you knew so well that you loved them.. When I think about it, atleast a month ago we were together, telling eachother we love eachother..And the way I felt. I feel empty and lonely all the time now, not seeing how someone could be as cruel enough to play with someone elses heart. I always have these feelings that if I gave him another chance..He wouldn't do it. But then I know he would, once a cheater always a cheater. The way I feel is weird, it's like my heart says yes..But my head says no. No one is giving me any advice on what to do, how to forget him.. I'm just so confused.

I got quite a few emails to share and would luv if you all would help out with some peer-to-peer advice so leave a comment and share your own stories as well by emailing Nina at quest4nina@gmail.com !!!!!!!!!! Lets keep this a community of women helping women, Sometimes speaking to a stranger is the best and strangers cant turn around to ur friends and gossip about ur problems...like we all know they do.

Challenge for the day !!!!!

Learn to say "No" by saying "Yes"

Make a "Yes" list. Only say yes to the things that need your attention at this time in your life, and dont say yes to things that you need to let go of. Remember:

1. Your self- care is always a valid excuse
2. You dont need to over-explain or defend your actions. Just tell the simple truth

Inner tip of the day !!!

Time is a created thing. To say " I dont have time" is like saying "I dont want to..."

Lao-tzu

Romantic Tip of the day !!!!!! (Freak Tip)

Car Games

1. Kiss at every red light or Kiss "it" at every red light.  I hope i dont have to break down what "it" is, lol.
2. Kiss everytime u spot a Mustang
3. Make love on a back road or rest stop
4. Once you have reached your destination, finish your kissing "it" game.
5. Good Luck !!!! and  B safe, buckle up :)

This Weekend !!!!

Find something to do with ur snuggle buggles :) that is not the same ol boring Dinner and a Movie. Actually research what your town has to offer and try something new. If ur single than check ur local paper or internet for speed dating and go with your girlfriends. Life is too short to stay in a little box !

Inner tip of the day !!!

The greatest gift that you can give yourself is a little bit of your own attention.

Romantic Tip of the day !!!!!!

Shower and oil up ladies and spray on your favorite perfume. Do your hair and makeup like your headed out for a night with your girls and throw on the sexiest panty set u got....If u live with ur man than keep him out the bathroom while u get ready and make sure his cell phone was left in his reach.....If u dont live with him than tell him to stop by because u bought him something and he has 2 get it asap. Now once ur sexxy is done and u practiced ur pose, take a pic with ur camera phone and send it 2 him...with a message telling him 2 meet u for a quicky. I had on too much oil and between me, him and the bathrooon floor...i thought i was on an amusement ride, lol. It was all worth it !!! Please email me any funny stories of ur efforts 2 share, Good Luck !!!!!!!

More reasons for romance

1. You'll reduce the chance that your partner will cheat on you.
2. You'll increase the probability that you will stay 2gether
3. You'll add depth and meaning to your relationship
4. You'll save money by expressing your love in lots of little creative ways

Side Bar question, How can i tell if we r meant 2 b???

I wanted to know how do you know if you and a person are really meant for each other??? I know just because you two love each other doesn't necessarily mean you're suppose to be together. I'm just not sure what to do...and If I do decide to move on, I don't even know where to begin with that process!!! PLEASE HELP!!! 

Weekly Challenge

Reflect on this year and write down 25 things you are proud of accomplishing . This may include ways that you've grown as a person, goals you achieved and positive changes that you have made. If your lacking 25 than think of things that you can do as simple as smiling more at people, volunteering to help some1 or spending more time with family. This list will either let u know 2 things....How much you do or How much you dont. :)

Taking care of the inside !!!

                                                          Inner tip of the day
Taking action is the only way to create positive long lasting change in your life. So get the hell up and do something.

Beauty Tip !!!

Brown Sugar ladies....I got a lil' secret that i picked up spending tooo much time in the skin care isle. If you r brown skinned than this works wonders for u. Have you ever wanted that bronze glow well it makes u look airbrushed and it is subtle but very sexxy and noticable. Go out and get Loreal Sublime Bronzing instant tanning lotion, put it all over your body like lotion and after 2 days watch what it does. I know i looked good but when my husband couldn't keep his hands off of me ....i knew i discovered something big. Its about $8-9 and i got mine at target but u can find it at any store with a skin care isle. I know the white girls checkin me out r like " why is this black girl buyin self tanning lotion"? It's a secret i kept in my head and im sharing it with u, Good Luck !!!

Romantic Tip of the day !!!!!!

For Her 2 do:
       Make love coupons and hide them in places he frequently checks. Reward your man for the simple things by giving him 5 coupons ,and he can only use 1 a day. Examples can be a sensual massage, Pop Rocks blow job, lol (amazing..email me 4 details), strip tease, dinner in bed with a movie etc....be creative !!!!   ( ladies get out your kids glitter and crayons and actually put effort into the coupons :)

For Him 2 do:
        Women tend to get stressed easily and keep moving thru tense pain and frustration. Give her a free pass today and u come by and cook her dinner in bed and light candles and cuddle (yes, i said cuddle). Ask her about her upcoming week and actually be interested in her conversation. Hey, if u wanna stress free relationship than make your woman happy and in return she'll always make sure your very well takin care of. :)

Daily Romance Tip !!!!

                                             Top 5 Reasons to be Romantic

1. You'll be happier
2. Your partner will be happier
3. You'll have sex more often
4. You'll enjoy sex more
5. You'll experience the spark of infatuation again

                                             

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...

Question: How important is sex in a relationship. I mean seriously I get tired of SEX!! People say to me that I will lose my man if I don't have more sex? True? PS I am a Woman!!

Luv tip 4 him:

It seems so corny and lame but trust me its important. Next time your man begins a conversation about anything and i mean anything (including sports), give him ur undivided attention....look him in his eyes and put an interesting look on your face just to let him know u r still  into every word he says. Ladies....if u ever wanna know why men leave or cheat on u with the unattractive chicka, well it has alot to do with her giving him the simple things like her undivided attention and corny giggles !!!

Must Read Email !!!!!

I recently got an email from a 24yr. old women, who by the way gave me permission to discuss. She wanted help in wondering why she can not get the type of man that she wants which is successful, respectful and has things of his own and not trying to get by on her accomplishments.

Well I "Nina" Says:
    "Say what you want and mean what you say". Make no compromises on the type of man that you are looking for, if you want a man with a stable career than dont stop until you get it. Sometimes as women we get the lonely itch and tend to speed up and fall into the arms of a man that we know does not posess the qualities that we want and need. Real love is strong and takes years to develope but until that comes to surface we are in a trance that i call " Cotton Candy Luv" its when everything is sweet and cloudy and when the sweet smoke clears your left with someone u wouldnt pawn off to your worst enemy. Take your time and do your research before the sperm meets the egg or you will be stuck trying to mold him into the man u use to dream of having. And trust me...they r like molding hard playdo:)